Children do better when they feel needed and loved.
This feeling is important for our kids and their emotional growth.
When a child feels that their thoughts and feelings matter, that they’re loved, and that they can make some decisions, it helps build their self-esteem.
It also makes it more likely for them to form good relationships with others, seek independence, and take on challenges in life.
Read also: 10 Best Tips to Change an Aggressive Child
So, how can we encourage this feeling of importance and thus help our children grow with confidence?
Here are 13 strategies to implement at home!
1. Pay attention to the child
Listen carefully to your child when you talk with them.
Show them that you are interested in what they say, ask them questions while looking at them.
2. Encourage family participation
Encourage your child to actively participate in family life.
Give them tasks to complete or decisions to make.
3. Spend quality time with the child
Spend good, undistracted time with your child.
Play, read, or have conversations without other things taking your attention away.
This helps you bond and have meaningful moments together.
4. Use positive words
Give your child supportive and positive words, especially when they make mistakes.
Let them know they are capable and can succeed.
This helps boost their confidence and motivation.
5. Jubilate with the child
Celebrate your child’s achievements, even if they’re small.
It shows them that you’re proud of their efforts and encourages them to keep trying and doing their best.
6. Consider the child’s opinion
Ask your child what they think about important things.
Make sure they understand that their opinion matters to you.
This helps them feel valued and heard.
7. Respect your child’s feelings
Respect your child’s feelings and don’t make them feel like their emotions are not important.
Avoid saying things like they’re exaggerating or need to toughen up.
You should acknowledge and understand their emotions.
8. Let the child partake in decision-making
Include your child in family decisions, like picking where to go on vacation or what to have for meals.
It makes them feel part of the family and lets them have a say in things.
9. Be consistent with the rules
Set up clear and consistent rules for your child so they know what’s expected of them.
This creates a safe and secure environment, making them feel protected and aware of what’s right and wrong.
10. Respect your child’s choices
Respect your child’s choices and decisions, even if they don’t match your preferences.
Whether it’s a question of clothing, choice of sport, or simply colors.
11. Let the child do small work at home
Give your child small responsibilities.
For example, let him do household chores.
They will feel needed and gain a sense of pride.
12. Do fun activities together
Do activities for fun, not performance.
For example, when playing board games with your child, you can tell them that you don’t mind winning or losing and that what matters to you is being with them.
13. Don’t accept the opinion of others about your child
Don’t give too much importance to the opinions of others.
For example, avoid making comments like, “What will people say if you go to the store in your old sweater?”
Read also: How Do You Talk to an Unhappy Child? (7 Easy Tips)
What to Do When Your Child Hurts You Emotionally?
When your child hurts you emotionally, you may be tempted to act quickly with anger.
But this is not going to help the situation in any way.
Here are what to do when your child hurts you emotionally:
1. Stay Calm
Try to stay composed and avoid reacting with anger or frustration.
Give yourself a moment to process your own emotions.
2. Avoid shouting
Shouting at the child will make him or her afraid of you.
This is not a good way of parenting, our children should learn from us how to respect others and not be afraid of them.
3. Don’t beat the child
If the child is below five years, he or she hasn’t learned how to control their emotions.
Beating them is not going to make things better, rather it will become worse.
4. Find solutions together
Work together to find solutions to prevent such emotional hurt from happening again.
This may involve setting rules or consequences.
5. Teach the child how to say sorry
Teach your child to say sorry when they hurt you emotionally, by doing this they will learn that it is not good to hurt people.
6. Tell the child that he or she did wrong
Don’t keep quiet when the child hurts you emotionally.
Tell them immediately that you are hurt and that you are not happy about it.
Read also: How Do You Enjoy a Difficult Child? (5 Simple Steps)
Is it OK to Tell Kids They Hurt Your Feelings?
Yes, it is ok to tell kids that they hurt your feelings.
This is the best way to teach kids empathy.
If you don’t tell them that you are hurt, they will repeat the action and hurt you even more.
Explain to the child that hurting people’s emotions is not right, because they will be unhappy when others hurt them too.
Most times, kids don’t know what hurts you.
It is ideal if you can keep reminding them that doing a particular thing makes you unhappy.
This way you will make them not repeat such bad attitudes.
How Do You Know If Your Child is Emotionally Damaged?
It may be difficult to say if your child is emotionally damaged.
But I’ll share with you some points that will help you know that.
1. Crying frequently
If your child cries a lot it means that he or she is emotionally damaged and needs serious attention to get better and stop crying.
A child therapist can do a great job here.
2. Not playing with other kids
If your child stops playing along with other kids or if he or she stops playing with others it shows that the child is emotionally damaged.
3. Don’t smile
Kids smile frequently.
There is a problem if your kid doesn’t smile or if they do not laugh when you say funny things.
4. Is afraid of others
Some kids run inside whenever they see other people or visitors.
This can happen especially if the kid was molested sexually.
5. If the child doesn’t say sorry or thank you
Kids are happy when gifts are given to them, but if the child is not excited when you get them gifts it is a sign of being emotionally damaged.
This also happens when they hurt others, they will find it difficult to say sorry.
Conclusion
It is difficult to raise an emotionally damaged child.
If things are not improving, you should contact a child therapist to take care of the child.
But this can be avoided if you make the child feel needed.
Read also: 6 Things Children No Longer Learn
Read also: How Do You Know If Your Child Doesn’t Respect You? (11 Easy Signs)